Every Missed Connection Is For Me

To my professor, - w4m

Date: 2011-04-19, 7:21PM CDT

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Looks like I’ve got a bit of a crush on you. What should I do about it? I think you’re too professional to even consider me…

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PostingID: 2335556365

Dear Student of mine,

First of all, what’s up with that comma? We may need to send you back to Keyboarding 101! Am I right!?

Secondly, as you may remember from our school’s bylaws that you didn’t read, relationships between students and professors are strictly prohibited. We cannot date. I know it’s hard, but it just can’t happen.

But while we’re talking of things that are hard, the same bylaws say nothing of handjobs in my office. Just dates and full on intercourse. So if you wanna do some hanj, come on down. My office hours are M-F 3pm until you finish off this handjob. Hope to see you soon!

I should have made this clearer in the syllabus.


Yours in higher education,

Your Professor


BLUE LINE AT CONGRESS COMING FROM COURT - w4m - 30 (CLINTON CTA )

Date: 2011-04-19, 11:15PM CDT

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YOU WERE COMING FROM COURT -MONDAY THE 18TH AT 3:30PM
YOU ASKED ME … THAN YOU EXIT AT JACKSON…

I only got off the train because you kept yelling at a brother. And I wasn’t leaving court for NOT having issues with impulse control.

Handsome man in suit on blue line - w4m (Logan Square)

Handsome man in suit on blue line - w4m (Logan Square)

Date: 2011-04-13, 9:26PM CDT

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We were on the blue line, and you caught me staring as we were waiting for the train to pull into the California stop. I know it’s rude to stare, but I couldn’t help it. Your black suit/light blue shirt/steel blue tie/black pea coat combination was fantastic. I know that probably sounds ridiculous coming from a girl wearing jeans who looked a bit disheveled thanks to allergies. However, I appreciate an attractive man in an equally attractive suit. I passed you on the sidewalk and wanted to compliment you on your suit, but you were wearing headphones and didn’t think you’d hear me. I’m sure a man like you doesn’t read missed connections, but on the off-chance you do, I just wanted to say thanks to you and your suit for making me smile.

  • Location: Logan Square
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PostingID: 2323992892

Baby, I think you need some new glasses. I ain’t worn a suit all week!